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About This List Created by: komodoDate Created: 1/2/2008 Times Viewed: 890 Item Count: 42
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| 4 1. What do you do if a blonde throws a pin at you? Run - she is still holding the grenade! |
| 4 2. Why did the blonde stare at the orange juice carton? It said "concentrate" on it |
| 4 3. How can you tell if a blonde's been using the computer? There's white-out on the screen. |
| 2 4. What do you call a blonde with two brain cells? Pregnant! |
| 1 5. Why did the blonde tip-toe past the medicine cabinet? She didn't want to wake the sleeping pills! |
| 1 6. How do you make a blonde laugh on a Wednesday? Tell her a joke on a Monday! |
| 0 7. How do you make a blondes eyes shine bright? Shine a torch in her ear! |
| 0 8. What do smart blondes and UFOs have in common? You always hear about them but never see any! |
| 0 9. I offered a blonde a penny for her thoughts.... she gave me change! |
| 0 10. Be careful never to let a blonde have a coffee break... It takes too long to retrain her afterwards! |
| 0 11. Why don't you see blonde pharmacists? They can't get the bottles into the typewriter! |
| 0 12. What do you call a blonde standing between two brunettes? A mental block! |
| 0 13. What do you call 100 blondes standing ear to ear? A wind tunnel! |
| 0 14. What do you call a blonde with half a brain? Gifted! |
| 0 15. What do blondes and beer bottles have in common? They are both empty from the neck up! |
| 0 16. Why did the blonde cross the road? "I don't know." Neither did she! |
| 0 17. Did you hear about the blonde with tire marks on her back? She crawled across the street when the sign said "DON'T WALK". |
| 0 18. A blonde tried to blow up her husband's car, but burned her lips on the tailpipe. |
| 0 19. What's five miles long and has an IQ of forty? A blonde parade! |
| 0 20. Want to know how to amuse a blonde for hours? Write "please turn over" on both sides of the paper! |
| 0 21. Did you hear about the blonde who stayed up all night to see where the sun went? It finally dawned on her! |
| 0 22. What do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back! |
| 0 23. Did you hear about the blonde that put lipstick on her forehead so she could make up her mind? |
| 0 24. A Blonde and a brunette were walking outside when the brunette said, "Oh look at the dead bird." The Blonde looked skyward and said, "Where, where?" |
| 0 25. How do you confuse a blonde? You can't, they have always been like that. |
| 0 26. Why did the blonde scale the chain-link fence? To see what was on the other side. |
| 0 27. How do you confuse a blonde? Put her in a round room and tell her to sit in the corner. |
| 0 28. How does a blonde try to kill a fish? She drowns it. |
| 0 29. A blonde is going to London on a plane. How can you steal her window seat? Tell her the seats that are going to London are all in the middle row. |
| 0 30. What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer? Frosted Flakes. |
| 0 31. What do you call a dumb blonde behind a steering wheel? An airbag. |
| 0 32. What do you call it when a blonde dyes her hair brunette? Artificial intelligence. |
| 0 33. What do you call a blonde with a brain? A golden retriever. |
| 0 34. How can you tell that a blonde sent you a fax? It has a stamp on it. |
| 0 35. How do you drown a blonde? Put a scratch 'n sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool. |
| 0 36. Hear about the blonde that bought an AM radio? It took her a month to figure out she could play it at night too. |
| 0 37. A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license.
She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys could get your act together.
Just yesterday you take away my license and now today you expect me to show it to you." |
| -1 38. Why did the blonde burn her ear? The phone rang while she was ironing! |
| -1 39. A blonde once shot an arrow into the air... but missed! |
| -1 40. Did you hear about the blonde tap dancer? She fell in the sink! |
| -1 41. Did you hear about the blonde who was a really good cook? She could get pop tarts out of the toaster in one piece! |
| -1 42. Did you hear about the blonde that threw away her weight loss video because she noticed that the people on the video were not losing weight either? |
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